Mental and physical abuse in a relationship is very common. Around 80% of Americans have experienced abuse of some kind, especially emotional abuse. Some don’t even realize they are experiencing until after their relationship, when they realize the real cause of the downfall. Symptoms or signs of being in an abusive relationships include:

– Public embarrassment: They pick the worst times to pick a fight and they also expose your secrets or make fun of you out in public.

– They put down your interests: They tell you that your likings are childish and a waste of time. It’s all just something to say so that they don’t want you doing without them. 

– Joking: They may have the urge to tell a so called joke and in reality the joke may have some truth into it. They are also overly sarcastic. 

– Character assassination: This strategy involves the word “always.” Meaning that they’ll use it as, “you’re always late, wrong, messing things up, disagreeable” etc. Overall, they are implying that you are not a good person and you need to do better.

– Dismissiveness: You tell them about something that’s important to you and they say nothing. Body language like eye-rolling, smirking, head shaking, and sighing.

– Unpredictability: They’ll come with rage out of nowhere, they will suddenly give you affection and love, or they could also become mad and moody all to keep you walking on eggshells.

– Jealousy: They accuse you of flirting or cheating on them. They get mad and control on who you should and shouldn’t hang out with. 

– Trivializing: When you want to talk about your hurt feelings, they accuse you of overreacting and they end up accusing you. Or they will ignore you and change the subject. They will say sorry, but not really mean it or they just won’t change. 

– Keeping you from socializing: Whenever you have plans to go out with either friends or with family, they will try to come up with a distraction as a way for you to not go. 

Remember don’t let anyone control you even if you think they could change.

https://www.healthline.com/health/signs-of-mental-abuse#control-and-shame